i just had sex bonerless
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
