You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
