Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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