I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
