batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
