He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I love you.
Bad choice
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
