a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize