Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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