i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
now i know why i became what i already was.
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
