i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
