okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
