did you get engaged???
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
