I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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