Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
