Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Randomize
