Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
