This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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