do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
