Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
