Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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