NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
