so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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