You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize