i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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