He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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