He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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