you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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