Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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