yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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