i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
