o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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