i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize