try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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