But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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