If that was your dad, he is hot
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
