I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
