this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
