It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Randomize
