His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
