I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
