Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
