She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
