a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
