I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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