Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
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