His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
