You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
