I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
