there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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