Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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